Discovering Baby Sign Language

I discovered baby sign language as a first-time mum with a never-ending thirst for parenting books, something many first-time parents can probably relate to.

One day, while out with my partner, we stumbled across a closing-down bookstore. Sitting on a shelf was Baby Signs: How to Talk with Your Baby Before Your Baby Can Talk, and naturally, it grabbed my attention.

We already teach babies to wave “bye bye” before they can speak, so it made perfect sense that this natural form of communication could be expanded. The idea of fewer tantrums was also pretty appealing, even though I was yet to experience one in all its glory.

It was already clear to me that our little girl understood far more than she could express. I devoured the book and enthusiastically handed it to my husband. He was completely on board with using baby signs with Inara, although actually reading the book was something he never quite got around to.

Babies typically say their first words around 12 months, but they understand much more long before then. Baby sign language helps bridge this gap, giving babies a way to express their needs, wants, and even emotions before spoken language fully develops.

For us, the benefits were hard to ignore:

• improved communication
• less frustration for both parents and babies
• support for early language development
• fewer tantrums, or at least less intense ones
• growing confidence as our baby realised she could communicate and be understood

But more than anything, baby sign language helped us build connection. It gave us another way to bond with our daughter and better understand each other.

We started simply with a few basic signs like “milk,” “more,” “all done,” and “water.” “More” quickly became our daughter’s favourite; more swinging, more tickles, more singing, more food.

The sign we used for “more” was very similar to clapping, which babies often learn around 9 months. Clapping is interestingly the universal sign for encore.

Repeating signs regularly and pairing them with actions helped our daughter begin communicating with us. Babies are incredibly motivated to connect, and as their motor skills develop, they will often create their own versions of signs too. That flexibility felt natural and became part of the fun.

The hardest part was remembering to use the signs consistently — and remembering what the signs even were in the middle of everyday life. For a while, I carried our baby signs book everywhere or searched for signs on my phone. It often felt disjointed and pulled me out of the moment. But we persevered, because seeing our little one’s face light up when she felt understood made it completely worthwhile.

Looking back, baby sign language was less about teaching signs and more about finding new ways to connect with our children before words fully arrived. Even focusing on just a few simple signs brought more communication, more understanding, and more connection into our everyday lives.